Monthly Archive: December 2006

OK, I’ve been neglecting y’all again.  Been busy, and had friends feeding me a lot more then I need to be eating.  They use the excuse of the season… well, spending it in the hospital is not my idea of a happy holiday season.  My blood pressure is 40 points high, and the only way I’m going to lower it is to LOSE WEIGHT.  At least 25-30 pounds.  I appreciate the attention and love and companionship, but, COME ON PEOPLE.

My neighbor across the hall has been trying to hook me up with her friends.  It’s not going to happen.  I won’t be with someone I can’t talk to, I don’t care how sweet she is.  Some of y’all though Kayla was dumb, well, she’s NOT.  I could talk to her about anything.  (Shame she couldn’t do the same for me… but ah well.)  The people Myra has been trying to fix me up with, well, I’ve had better conversations with rocks and trees… that’s not meant as an insult, although I know it can be taken as one.  They’re good people.  But I don’t need someone who needs me controlling their life because they don’t know any better and don’t want to learn.  I need a friend and partner. 

Anyhow, having a fun time, getting everything I want except lower credit card bills… need to get off my ass and get a job so I can reduce those… Mom and Dad have been very helpful, just am trying to not need any help and failing.

Guess I should stop ranting now.

Aum namaha Shivaye!

Hugs,
Me

I
played at last night’s (Thursday) Open Mic at the Courtyard Gallery. 
I’d like to be doing this more often, but whatever.  I played a nice
set of 3 songs… can’t wait to hear the podcast to see which one got
selected (last time I played he included my whole set).

The Courtyard Gallery’s TrueHome Open
Mic Night is held every Thursday night from 9 to midnight.  The entire
night is digitally recorded, and Carlos (the gallery owner) edits it
down to somewhere around an hour and posts it at his website –
http://ashevillecourtyard.com – as a free podcast download.  The
results of a Thursday night performance are posted the following
Monday.  Last week’s podcast was downloaded by over 11,000 people…
the room only holds around 50.  Now if I could just find a program that
cuts a large audio file into sections… that is free…

The
songs I performed were “Hasten Down the Wind” by Warren Zevon, “Cows
With Guns” by The Arrogant Worms, and “First Christmas” by Stan
Rogers.  At least one will be included in the podcast.

Hugs,
Me

Had a wonderful weekend with SerpentStone Family.. the Yule Gathering was a little early this year, but it usually is…  Got more contact with all the wonderful loving people who are still part of SerpentStone.  I myself was cycling between feeling really a solid part of the Family and having major insecurity problems, but that was all between my ears and is a continuation of the problems I’ve been having.

I’m waiting for the new issue of PaganPages.org to come out… hope y’all read my article this month (for that matter, go back in the archives and read my past articles, I’ve been included since the May issue).

My Panthers lost today.  It was a sad game, they couldn’t get a running game together and Chris Weinke (long my favorite QB on the team but never gets a chance) threw for nearly 450 yards… but 3 interceptions and 0-for-2 on 4th down.

Guess I’d better run.  My phone’s ringing again.

Hugs,
Me

OK, I’m feeling a bit better today.  Got a lot done, even though it sent me into anxiety for a while.  Frankie got her nurse to drive her up, and we spent a pleasant time at lunch and did a tad bit of shopping.  Had a nice phone call with Viola… got a couple belated birthday wishes from cousins who have not talked to me in a looooooooooooooooooong time.  I’ll be all right, just like I said before.

Hugs,
Me

Your heart is the temple where God should be enshrined. Your good thoughts are the flowers, your good words the hymns, your good deeds the rituals. And love is the offering.

– Mata Amritanandamayi Ma (also called Maa Amma, known as “the hugging saint”)

Guess I wasn’t supposed to have fun today.  I got lots of good wishes, a few presents, a couple of cards… but I just felt bad all day.  Nothing could cheer me up.  Couldn’t find anyone to go out with… Myra fed me some storebrand pizza, which didn’t stay down.  And then my Panthers blew a perfectly good lead in the 4th quarter and lost the game.

Hugs,
Me

OK.  It’s another of those days that comes once a year.  My birthday.  It’s hard to face alone, especially as I get older.  Still in good health, would love to have someone to share with… actually I have two friends I can share anything with except my life, apartment, body… all the insignificant stuff… taking applications, must not be in need of money.  I can take care of myself, but can’t afford you.  Them’s the breaks.  Looking for a good man, I’m right here; looking for a good wardrobe, go find a football player or lawyer to take care of you.

Depressed as usual.  Sorry.  Things are going well, just not where I most want them to.

Hugs,
Me

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Your heart is the temple where God should be enshrined. Your good thoughts are the flowers, your good words the hymns, your good deeds the rituals. And love is the offering.
– Mata Amritanandamayi Ma