Monthly Archive: May 2008

Why Geeks Make Better Boyfriends/Husbands

(Stolen from Craigslist)

1.) While geeks and nerds may be awkward, they’re well-meaning 9 out
of 10 times. That smooth dude with the sly grin and the spider hands?
Wonder what HIS intentions are… plus, I’ve never had a geek guy not
call me when he said he would. Score major points THERE.

2.) They’re useful. In this tech-savvy world, it’s great to have a
b/f who can make your laptop, desktop, and just about anything else
that plugs into a wall behave itself.

3.) They’re more romantic than they’re given credit for. Ok true,
their idea of romance might be to make up a spiffy web-page with all
the reasons why they love you, with links to pics of you and sonnets
and such… but hey. It lasts longer than flowers, plus you can show your

4.) Due to their neglected status, there are plenty to choose from.
You like ‘em tall and slender? There are plenty of geeks/nerds who are.
You like ‘em smaller with more meat on their bones? Got that too.

5.) They’ve got brains. Come on now, how can intelligence be a bad thing?

6.) Most are quite good at remembering dates. Like birthdates and
such, especially if they know it’ll make you happy. Due again to their
neglected status, they’re more attentive than guys who “have more
options”. Plus, with all that down time without a steady girlfriend,
they’ll likely have mental lists of all the things they’d love to do
once they GOT a girlfriend.

7.) Sex. Yep. Sex. I’m not really familiar with this myself, but
I’ve friends who’ve been intimate with geek guys and it’s raves all
around. They say a virgin wrote the Kama Sutra… all that time thinking
about sex, imagining sex, dreaming about sex, (they are male after all)
coupled with a desire to make you happy? Use your imagination.

8.) They’re relatively low-maintenance. Most can be fueled on pizza,
Twinkies and Mt Dew. No complicated dinners needed here, so if you’re
not the best cook, eh. Can you order a pizza?

9.) Most frequent bars as often as slugs frequent salt mines. You
won’t have to worry much about your geek guy getting his “groove” on
with club hotties because, frankly, he’ll be too busy rooting around
under his computer wondering where that spare cable went. You won’t
have to worry about him flirting with other women because, 9 out of 10
times, he’ll zip right by them in a perfect b-line towards the nearest
electronics store. I’ve seen this happen.
Me: “Eww. Victoria Secret’s Models… They’re so skinny. How is that feminine? You can see her ribs!”
Geek Guy: “ooooooo…”
Me: “Hey!” *notices he is staring lustfully towards the computer store*
Geek Guy: “What?”
Me: “Never mind…”

10.) Although he may not want to go to every outing with you, you
can arrange swaps, as in, you’ll go to his Gamer Con dressed as an elf
princess if he’ll take you to the ballet. Plus, if he doesn’t want to
go someplace with you, you won’t have to worry much about what he’s up
to. You’ll probably come home to find him asleep on his keyboard in a
sea of Mt. Dew cans with code blinking from the screen. It’s ok. He’s
used to this. Just toss a blanket over him and turn out the light.

11.) His friends aren’t jerks. I can’t stress this enough. You’ll
more likely get “Omg! A GIRL!! Can I see?!” than “Hey hot stuff back
that ass up here and let me get some grub on…” They’re awkward geeks
too and will, 9 times out of 10, treat you with the utmost respect and,
more than likely, a note of awe. A cute girl picked one of their clan
to date? It could happen to them! Hope! Drag some of your single
girlfriends over, open up a pack of Mt. Dew, crack open the DnD set and
get working. Nothing impresses geek guys more than a girl who can
hack-n-slash (well ok maybe if she can code… a geek can dream).

12.) They’re rarely if ever possessive. They trust you, so you can
be yourself around them. You like to walk around the house in a ratty
t-shirt for comfort? He won’t care. He does too! They won’t get pissy
if you don’t wear make-up or don’t want to bother primping your hair.
If you gain a few pounds, they won’t try their best to make you feel
like crap.

13.) They’re usually very well educated. Physics majors and the
like. See #5. You won’t have to listen to him blathering on about his
car (ok maybe a little), he’ll have loads of other interesting things
to talk about. Politics, world events, how much the chicken burgers
down at the local place rock, so long as you douse them in hot sauce…

14.) You’ll almost never have to hear, “Yaw dawg whazzap!!” plop out
of their mouths. Unless it’s in jest. They spell properly, use correct
punctuation, and are able to tell the difference between the toilet and
the floor. They almost never get “wasted”, so you won’t have to worry
about coming home to find him and his friends passed out on the floor
amidst a pile of beer bottles. Mt. Dew cans, perhaps…

15.) And the final reason why geeks and nerds make great boyfriends:
They actually give a damn about you. Not how you look (though that’s a
plus), not how skinny you are, not how much make-up you primp yourself
up with, but they like you for you. That kind of thing lasts longer
than “DaMN baby you got a fine ass!!!” Believe me.

Pagan 12-Steps

A close friend who has known me since the 1980s was asking me about trying to find a copy of the “Pagan 12-Steps” program that we knew about in the mid-1980s.  After both of us searched the Internet for hours trying to find it (I know who wrote it, but got blasted for publishing that information back then), I gave up and went to my file cabinets.  I found 3 hardcopies of it…  It should be stated that this was written for “Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families”, but, like all 12-Step programs, it can be adapted to any problem.  I’m publishing it here as a public service… in other words, so I can find it easier next time, LOL.  This was written in Denver around 1986-1988.


Twelve-Step Program for

Pagan Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families


1.  We are facing the fact that what we are doing with our lives has not been working;

2.  We have become convinced that significant improvement is possible;

3.  We are committed to seeking wellness and competence within ourselves;

4.  We are reviewing our behavior patterns, successful and unsuccessful, and are continually recording our findings;

5.  We have faced and accepted our errors, and are sharing them with other people and with our God(s);

6.  We are willing to let go of our mistaken systems;

7.  We choose to work on releasing these systems, using any and all ethical means available to do so;

8.  We are learning how our errors have impacted others, and are working to redress the balance with each such person, so much as may be or may become possible;

9.  We are doing what we can to heal our old relationships, harming none;

10.  We are continually searching for and implementing positive changes to our behavior to the best of our ability;

11.  We are working in our own ways to open ourselves to our highest ideals and to attune ourselves to universal health and harmony;

12.  As our own healing progresses, we are learning to use our energy and the energy around us to heal others, to assist the ecology, and to honor (the) God(s).



Anugraha (Divine Grace) has been hitting me like a ton of lovely bricks lately.  I have gotten unasked-for help from my mother, had a 26″ Sharp TV and 20″ computer monitor “dumped” on me by my former next-door neighbor, and come into 2 Gb of computer memory (RAM), a 40 Gb hard drive, and a JVC DVD-player-recorder/VCR combo unit for next to nothing.  My non-existent roommate got a new job at Pisgah Inn, where he will be living at least on his days of work, at an incredible rate of pay and benefits, and will start paying me back what he owes me (at a higher amount per week than I would have asked for).  My new jobs are working out quite well; I’m enjoying the heck out of being Administrative Editor for Eternal Press, and putting bikes on the floor of Habitat Home Store for sale (to support their building projects) is also a hoot.  If there is a downside, I’ve fallen behind in my non-work-related Internet stuff.

May the bird of prosperity crap all over you!


Been really busy lately, plus the fact that my Internet (and phone) was down for over 24 hours…  Don’t want y’all to think I’m ignoring ya…  I’m really lucky to have so many really good people as friends on Xanga.


Nearly three years ago, I and three of my friends started our own Church, Pathways Sanctuary.  The four of us average about 2.25 Doctorates of Divinity apiece, and the State of North Carolina had no problem with us doing this.  We did it to prove a point — and the point is proven, although not the way we would have liked it to have been.

We saw that there are dozens of “churches” online where you can get – for free or for $5 or $10 – ordained as a minister.  No questions asked, other than your name and address.  People were buying certificates and diplomas, perhaps only to paper their walls.  My idea, and the concept we implemented, was to charge a little bit more ($20) AND ask for references that you were actually performing ministerial activities in your community (real life or online).  We would check the references, and approve you if we felt you were doing the work; if you were rejected, we would refund $10 of your application fee (it costs us something to check those references).  We thought that a verified, verifiable ministerial license/ordination certificate would be in demand, not just something to hang on your wall for giggles.

Apparently we were wrong.  We have had a few (maybe as many as 5) nibbles over the past 3 years, but have issued no certificates save to ourselves (the Board).  It appears that HAVING standards is the equivalent of HAVING TOO HIGH of standards.

If you’re interested in proving us RIGHT, please visit Pathways Sanctuary and apply.


Things have been hectic, and look more hectic for next week.

I just had a minor “heart attack” (not a real one) when I got both my computers connected to the hub for Internet use, turned them on… and could not get to Ubuntu.  After several tries, I booted to Windows, which was successful; after making sure I had an Internet connexion, I rebooted to Ubuntu and IT WORKED!  (Deep sigh of relief, mopping brow, thanking all the gods of electricity and photons — Hermes, right?).

I have several assignments to do for Eternal Press, hope I remember what they all are.  BTW, our May E-zine is out, write me if you want me to email you a copy.

This week is going to be a challenge.  In addition to all my work for EP, I have a meeting with my boss at EP (online) to get a new assignment (assigning all ISBNs for our books) on Monday; Tuesday is both Election Day and the meeting of the Asheville-Buncombe Coalition for the Homeless (service providers meeting); Wednesday I meet my new Physical Terrorist and have to establish a schedule with them; Thursday is AHN and I need to get some bus passes (hope I have the money for that); and Friday I start my new job, volunteering Friday afternoons at Habitat (for Humanity) Home Store — they have asked me to work on bicycles for them.

I am just now de-stressing from my computer not working.  Maybe I should have waited an hour or two — but while all that was happening, my old ex-neighbor John was visiting, and was trying to help… and then left before I was done.  Two points of stress – one, he wanted to play with GRUB to get my computer working (which turned out to not be necessary); and two, he left before it was finished, leaving me to have to say goodbye and deal with my computer messing up at the same time.

Ah well.  I’m still breathing, my pulse is slowing, and I’m caught up on everything for now except my EP work.