Yearly Archive: 2012

Punching in

I’ve been lax about posting here lately. Sorry about that. Nothing much happening. I have been getting triggered a lot by Sunshine’s stuff, but that’s to be expected. I seem to have linked to her head issues, so that when she’s in pain, so am I. I kinda wanted that, so that I could ground it out and help her that way, but I’ve been having huge problems grounding, so I wind up screeching at her while she whines at me. It’s amazing that we still love each other so much, but it’s obvious that we do. So she beats herself up about hurting, and I beat myself up about yelling at her, and we got back to loving each other as much as we can. I really think we’ll get through this in good shape, but it will be hard work doing so.

Have a light week this week, if Sunshine lets me keep it that way. I’ve been doing way too much, and am too easily exhausted.

Guess that’s it for now.


Happy Ostara

We’re going to start packing tomorrow for a weekend at Splendor Hollow with my wonderful Family for our Ostara Gathering. I haven’t updated my Gathering Schedule yet, so I’m not sure when the other Gatherings are (or where) just yet. I’ll probably just go to the ones at Splendor Hollow.

My sweetie is adjusting to her new life, with me and without drugs (clonazepam, lamotrigine, and Celexa). Long trip for her, but she is facing it bravely and doing fairly well so far. Have to keep hoping for a full recovery. Those things are not safe, and she went totally toxic on them. Have to keep her safe. I also have to limit my own triggers so she is not overwhelmed with my own emotional issues.

Not sure what else to say. Sure has been hot lately, I had to hook up the air conditioner today.



A lot happening here.

My sweet Sunshine lost her job in Columbia TN and has moved in with me. Saves a lot on gas, but we have to get some income if we’re going to make it. Hard to move around my little trailer, but if we can get her Disability we can apply for some new, almost-opened apartments about a half mile from here. We’ve had to get her address changed with the USPS, IRS, drivers license bureau, SSA, and just about everyone else in the country.

One of the people on my Family phone plan had not paid me for 4 months. When I cut her line off, she blamed it all on me… so I gave the phone to Sunshine, and she gave her ex back his phone. I’m going to change the phone numbers to TN 865, which will lose one of the people on the plan 🙁 but I might be able to sweet-talk AT&T into just letting that go. I need to get the phone back so I can get out of this silly Android phone — it’s costing me about $35 per month for data charges and whatnot.

Had a couple of wonderful days at Cat Faber’s house, singing the day away. Cat is a Big Name Filker… but amazingly doesn’t know that many other BNFs and I do. She keeps commenting on how much music I know, makes me feel good. I love presenting little-known-but-great music to people who appreciate it.

Hope your lives are gong as well as mine.


Another weekend trip

So why is it I only remember to post here when I’m about to take another trip to Columbia TN or somewhere?

I’m getting a lot done… and not getting a lot done, and need to keep records about what I need to be working on and where I am with them.

We managed to get my MedFree group up and running again, perhaps permanently. I also got some updates done on my new website, Recovery Empowerment Resources, and even did a good bit of work for David Pereda and his new novel, However Long the Night, and updated Blind Lemming Chiffon’s website some.

Haven’t been able to do much int he way of worship lately other than private. It’s too cold to go out in the woods. I tried to visit some friends but it wasn’t a good time for them.

By the way, if anyone wants to read a book… David Pereda has a 25% off coupon on his new novel, and if you read the book and post a review on Amazon he will refund ALL your money. Details are on his blog, which can be found at . David is a great guy who has been paying me way too much money to help promote his books, and if they ever start selling it might be worth it to him.

And yes, my honey sent me money so I can go spend the next 3 days with her.


Heading out

I’m about ready to throw the last of the things in the car for my late-weekend trip to Columbia TN to be with my sweetie.

I’m amazed at the lack of flack I’m taking for this relationship. Yes, we’re seemingly perfect for each other. Yes, she has grey hair. But Monday is her 33rd birthday, making her a few years younger than my children. Anyhow, I’m in love, and she did all the chasing. Why a young woman would want to chase me, I have no idea — but she is not eye candy or an arm-dangly-thing, she’s a special woman with special needs (I don’t mean Short Bus) and I appear to fit those needs quite nicely. Are we perfect for each other? No, but we fit together in the area we haven’t found anyone who can fit, the emotional nature. I’ve had prettier women and smarter women (and richer women), but this is the one who takes care of me when I need it, lets me take care of her when she needs it, and the way we care for each other is exactly the way we have always wanted to be cared for.

Defensive? Hell yeah. Always fear. What happens if she gets older and changes? Well, I can only hope she changes with me, but if not, I’ll let her go as gently as she deserves. I hope that never happens, and I’m beginning to believe that hope is real.



OK, so I forgot to post here for a while.

I’ve been busy working on my new website

helping to form the Tennessee Association of Peer Specialists

went to Atlanta for GAFilk and did some wonderful singing, playing, and listening and met Cat Faber and found out she lives only about 20 minutes away from me

have been keeping my honey from melting down at work or at home

my cat loves me again and, for the first time since moving here in September, has started sleeping on the bed again

am trying to help my friend Blind Lemming Chiffon regain control of his website

and a few other things. Like editing a friend’s book. And watching a lot of football.

Also have been trying to get my songwriting mechanism started again. A special Serenity filk is trying to bubble up but it’s not bubbling right yet.

Welcome to the year in which the Mayan calendar “ends”. In care you haven’t noticed, in Mayan mythology this will be the end of the Fifth Age. That means there have been four previous Ages, and there is likely to be a Sixth.

Oh yeah, and I haven’t been spending enough time practicing my new violin.