Monthly Archive: November 2013


I’m working today. The buses are not running. My employer made a decision that my manager could pick me up and get me a return ride from another house. And I have a job, which I’ve held for over 6 months. For that I am thankful.

But this is the first Thanksgiving Day I can remember that I was not sitting down with family. I’ve shed a tear or two on that.

Why is it so hard to celebrate the successes and so easy to see the hurts?




Feeling Dumb

I went to a meetup tonight, to learn how to use WordPress to make money, either to monetize my blog or add my store to it, maybe even combine my 3 sites

Got there late, as i knew I would (started at 7:30 and I don’t get off work until 8). Walked in to a room full of people speaking a much higher level of Technese than I can dream of.

Only thing I found out was that (a) I’m on the wrong WordPress site (should be, (b) if I was on the right one, everything I could do is over my head, and (c) they don’t cater to newbies. They weren’t mean about it, and tried to sound like they were supportive, but I couldn’t understand anything.

There is a chance (I could not understand the explanation) that I can install the WordPress plugin on my Hippo Haven site and then use all these plugins they were talking about (again, if I could ever understand what they do and how to use them).

My closest friend who understands Technese does not understand WordPress. So I’m screwed… or can fumble through it myself.

You can bet it will be a long time before I go to one of those meetups again.




Xanga didn’t forsake me after all

My old blog was at, a site which has decided to reinvent itself on a new host and charge almost $50 per year just to keep my blog. I thought I had lost all my old posts… a good friend suggested I move them, post by post, to my blog here at WordPress, which seemed like too much work to do.

Today I decided to try to log into Xanga and see what was left. What I found was that they had set up all my blogs to be downloaded and imported into any WordPress site (OK, I had to unzip the file and upload 15 different XML files, but that was wayyy easy).  This has been done, and this site now has all my personal blogs (assuming Xanga included everything, which it looks like).

Enjoy going back through my life. It has been a rough one but mostly rewarding.




Saved By The Puppy

OK. So here I have a nice notebook computer. But I’ve wiped my operating system. I’ve installed a perfectly good version of Linux but it won’t boot except from the DVD drive. And ASUS technicians have stopped talking to me … probably just one setting wrong somewhere in BIOS Setup.

So I have a computer which will read and write my hard drive but not boot from it. What can I do?

And then I remember Puppy Linux, a very tiny version of Linux which completely loads into RAM… and which saves its setup information = but not its bootup = on the hard drive. I love Puppy. I get out my old LuPu disk (Puppy based on Lucid Lynx Ubuntu)… and find that the video drivers, X.ORG, do not run. No problem, there’s a newer version, Precise Puppy (based on Precise Pangolin Ubuntu) and even that has been updated. And it works!

The browser included runs great, but I wanted to use SRWare Iron. No problem, there’s a PUP for that… and I installed it, only to find that it is reporting my Flash Player is out of date (which report I do not get on the smaller, older browser, SeaMonkey). Ah well, getting more things done. Still have to add in all my files (saved to an external hard drive) and get to work catching up my bank account spreadsheet. UPDATE: I discovered that I’m running version 22 of Iron, and 29 is current… trying to download and install 29 (30 is current for Windoze).

It’s odd that I have just exactly the situation for which Puppy is the perfect solution. Good to revisit an old friend.




Well, my lovely new computer, running a badly-designed Windows 8, is limping along. Right now, there is no Windows on it… I have another operating system installed but it does not boot, thanks to the wonderful AMI BIOS with UEFI. Most of you don’t have a clue what that means, and I’m on the edge of understanding myself.

Windows 8 sucks. You have two desktops, and neither one of them can work independently of the other, so you’re always presented with both unless the computer loads a program quickly enough to not see the second one come up. I liked Windows 7.

So anyhow, I tried to install LinuxMint (Olivia, MATE, 64-bit for the tech geeks out there). After several emails with ASUS to find out how to bot to ANYTHING other than Windows, it installed to my D: drive (sda6, again for the geeks). It did not boot. But Windows was still there on my C: drive any time I wanted to use it, and I could boot to Mint from a live DVD.

I decided to see if Ubuntu would do me better.

Wrong move.

Very wrong move.

I burned the Ubuntu disk and loaded it. I did not like the option it was presenting me, so I tried to exit. I could not. I shut down the computer via the power button.

And now, no Windows. No Mint. No Ubuntu. I thought it had merely wiped my Windows bootloader. But no, examination (again, using the LinuxMint live DVD) proved that Ubuntu TOTALLY WIPED MY ENTIRE HARD DRIVE and formatted it as an ext4 drive (again, geeks only need note).

So, until ASUS can send me a new Windows setup disk, I can only use my computer with the Mint live disk. And all my files were wiped… although most were previously saved at my ASUS cloud drive, so it’s just a temporary loss.

I was planning to spend the weekend editing old articles I had written, to submit them to another journal. I probably could have done that anyway (the articles are also saved at several locations in the cloud) but needed to determine why my computer was not working (said discovery being enumerated above).

Isn’t it odd how the more stressed you are, the more things happen to increase stress? I think the Universe gets the idea that stress is what you LIKE so it gives you MORE.




And also losing it

I got out to Walking Fern Farm yesterday among so many people who love me, for a meeting to determine our Festivals, Moon Rituals, and Male and Female Retreats. Soon after I got there I started crying.

I’ve been so overwhelmed. I’m doing the best I can. But at my age, going from barely being able to take care of myself to having to take care of a good-sized house, a fiance, and her daughter, all by myself, has been too much for me. I have no way of fixing it… other than finding an under-the-table job which pays me to do nothing, and I don’t think anyone’s out there. I’ve tried selling my music and some meditation necklaces, and nobody is buying. My honey is selling jewelry, and has no market. We’re not begging (most of the time) but nothing is happening to keep us from needing to beg.

I got a lot of sympathy and a lot of advice, most of which I can’t use but it was welcome hearing people trying to help.

I came home and crashed. Slept until 6:30. And was still tired at bedtime.

Some of the fatigue could be from the new blood pressure medication, but I’m not feeling that. It’s the stress that just doesn’t go away, and not all of it is financial.

If you can help, my music can be purchased at and the meditation necklaces and other things at .

Losing It

All this summer I have not been losing weight as I normally do. Usually September is my biggest weight loss month. (I gain and lose weight like a bear, put on in the Winter and take off in the Summer/Fall). I had pretty much given up on making a new low, as September ended with me at 218. Not bad, but not below 200 which was my goal.  Last Autumn I got down to 209.8, a new low and the least I have weighed since I was 31 (weight gain caused by psych drugs, which eventually also caused kidney failure).

Well, yesterday I found myself at 210. And today it was 209.6, a new low. I don’t know what is happening but I’ll take it.

I think I am eating enough, and healthily enough (could do better).

I also passed my 6-month mark at my job. Been a long time since I kept a job this long, and there don’t seem to be any issues.

Worried about health care — I haven’t heard from DHS about my food stamps, and I probably don’t deserve any, but that also means I don’t get my Medicare premium paid, which hits me in the wallet again. And might mean I have to change Part D supplement plans, which also could mean a premium. I got a letter from Medicare that the plan I’m on consistently rates 1 or 2 stars and that better was available… I went through the menus and was told there were 3 available plans, but when I hit Continue, the page said there were 0 plans. I spent about an hour on the phone with Medicare, to no avail. The website was apparently under heavy use (NOT an Obamacare/ACA website).

Guess that’s it for now.



NC Claims To OWN Citizen – NEED HELP!

This is forwarded from MindFreedom International’s MindShield.

Hello All,

I would like to pass along an alert that was written by one of our members, Cindi Fisher, for another of our members, Jennifer Vaughan, who is in distress and called last week to let us know that she would like to activate her Shield. Cindi has been working with Jennifer for several weeks now and was able to include contact information for the Director of Adult Protective Services, managing Jennifer’s case in the alert that she wrote on Jennifer’s behalf below.

In Support,

Amanda Pelkey
Office Manager

MindFreedom International
Phone: 541-345-9106 & Toll Free in USA: 1-877-MAD-PRID[E]
Email:, Fax: 480-287-8833
PO Box 11284. Eugene, OR 97440-3484

Follow us on Facebook!
>> Does the State Own Jennifer Vaughan?
>> by Investigative Mental Health Advocate Cindi Fisher
>> “The STATE OWNS Jennifer!” So said the employee of the North Carolina
>> state
>> licensed adult care home, to Cindi Fisher, when questioned about
>> constitutional
>> and human violations of Jennifer’s rights occuring under their care.
>> Jennifer
>> has been confined against her will, for over two months; most recently
>> forced to
>> reside in this senior adult care home.
>> Jennifer’s 3 month old baby was being welled cared for by his grandmother
>> and
>> Jennifer at their home, when the state, Department of Social Services
>> (DSS),
>> invaded their home, unlawfully removed  Jennifer one day, and the next day
>> snatched  3 month old Baby Vaughan from the grandmother’s arm under the
>> preemptive pretense that he might suffer some unknown harm in the future.
>> Their
>> home was safe and healthy; their was no drug use, no cigarette smoke, no
>> alcohol
>> use, no criminal records; indeed it was a home  that had to be free of
>> scents
>> and chemicals because both Mom and Jennifer were chemically sensitive. DSS
>> later
>> confirmed through their own doctor appointment for Baby Vaughan that he
>> was
>> happy and healthy, but still refused to return him to his home. DSS makes
>> money
>> every day that Baby Vaughan is kept away from his happy home and the adult
>> care
>> home profits daily from Jennifer’s confinement as they are using
>> Jennifer’s
>> money to pay for the commitment.
>> North Carolina ‘s Dare County DSS makes preemptive Baby Strike
>> Jennifer, who is legally competent, was seeing her own doctors for
>> conditions
>> related to trauma from spousal abuse, when Dare County Department of
>> Social
>> Service (DSS) overstepped their legal boundaries and took control of
>> Jennifer
>> and her baby.
>> This is all mainly, because her mother was accused of not
>> believing Jennifer is mentally ill;  did not force psychiatric drugs on
>> her, but
>> sought proper treatment for head trauma from a top specialist in the
>> country;
>> and was consulting with an informed pediatrician concerning vaccine
>> choices for
>> Baby Vaughan. ( and indeed even if she did have a diagnosis of a mental
>> illness,
>> mental illness is not of itself a lawful reason to separate a mother and
>> child;
>> and not vaccinating a baby at 3 months or older is not a crime either)
>> Please email or Call Adult Protective Services and ask for Director,
>> Melanie
>> Corprew: and leave the message  below Mon-Fri  between  8:30am-5:00pm EST
>> only
>> ( ignore Melanie’s voicemail message and just leave your message anyway)
>> Her
>> number is  252-475-5500 and her email is to:
>> 1) ” FREE Jennifer Vaughan and her baby,” to be with her friends and
>> family
>> and let her choose her own doctor, therapist and support circle
>> 2) And investigate social worker Stephanie Ryder and Guardian ad litem
>> Susan
>> Harmon-Scott for (egregious) violations of Jennifer and Baby Vaughan ‘s
>> Basic
>> Human, State and Constitutional Rights;
>> And tell the North Carolina Bar 919.828.4620) to:
>> 1) to investigate Prosecuting Attorney Courtney Hull for unethical conduct
>> by
>> supporting  DSS’s  clearly illegal misconduct.
>> If you have time please drop
>> Cindi Fisher ( a quick email and  let her know you
>> emailed
>> or called.
>> Cindi Fisher, will be blogging for Jennifer from inside and outside
>> contacts.
>> Cindi will also be beginning a Fast and Pray Hunger Strike Tuesday
>> November 12
>> for 1) Jennifer and her baby;
>> 2)Cindi’s own son; and in response to the very recent crisis of  Human
>> Rights
>> Violations, 3)  for several other individuals she is advocating
>> for.Critically
>> Important Doctor’s appointment arbitrarily cancelled
>> The latest violation, the last straw for Jennifer, was DSS’s cancellation
>> of a
>> DSS-scheduled doctor appointment that Jennifer had expected would
>> facilitate her
>> release to go home from a forced, miserable confinement. This cancellation
>> was
>> the second missed doctor appointment caused by DDS interference and
>> clearly
>> retaliation over motions filed in court to expose DSS illegal
>> misconduct.
>> Jennifer now forbidden to contact her own doctor.
>> Even worse, DSS
>> has now been prohibited her from contacting her own doctor or any doctor
>> and
>> instead, DDS demands she take any medical concerns she has directly to DSS
>> agents who rarely answer the phone – and give no guarantee that her
>> messages
>> will be returned
>> . Jennifer desperately Needs Our Help
>> . Jennifer’s hopes and
>> expectations have been so crushed by this last retaliation that she is now
>> pleading that people call and demand her release from this unjust
>> imprisonment.
>> Jennifer’s mother also wants others to know that:
>> 1) Jennifer is not allowed to receive and open her own mail; instead all
>> of
>> Jennifer’s mail is given to DDS’s Stephanie Ryder, without Jennifer’s
>> knowledge
>> of what she has received, and after opening it determines what mail
>> Jennifer is
>> allowed to read,
>> 2) her mother who is forbidden to visit jennifer, because she is her main
>> suipport, tried to simply deliver food to the facility for Jennifer as she
>> had
>> begged her mother to do, and was forced to leave by their security guard
>> without
>> being allowed to leave the food…Jennifer says the food at this senior
>> facility
>> is tasteless and you never get enough
>> 3) her mother, who is Jennifer’s main support, is forbidden to visit
>> Please email or Call Adult Protective Services Director, Melanie Corprew:
>> and
>> leave your message between Mon-Fri only 8:30am-5:00pm EST. ( ignore
>> Melanie’s
>> voicemail message and just leave a message anyway)
>> 1) ” FREE Jennifer Vaughan
>> and her baby,” to be with her friends and family and let her choose her
>> own
>> doctor, therapist and support circle”
>> 2) And investigate social worker Stephanie
>> Ryder and Guardian ad litem Susan Harmon-Scott for (egregious) violations
>> of
>> Jennifer and Baby Vaughan ‘s Basic Human, State and Constitutional Rights;
>> and
>> Pros Attorney Courtney Hull for unethical conduct.
>> If you have time please drop
>> Cindi Fisher ( a quick email and  let her know you
>> emailed
>> or called. And follow this and other stories at