Tag Archive: home

Still Barding Along

I’ve been practicing quite a bit on Rosaleen, and even got the string replaced on Otto (Chromaharp). Spent considerable time at Emmy and Ken’s over the weekend, assembled a couple of kitchen stools and helped move some stuff around. We made a dent on the mess in the basement but have much more to go.

Work is still going along, tonight was pretty good.

Goddess has really been passing the blessings along. I have a new twin bed which is a lot more supportive than my old one, and the neighbors across the hall have been moving out and giving me all the stuff they don’t want to move, including lots of food and spices and a couple furniture items. I have to figure out what to do with my old mattress and box spring, don’t think they accept them at the Conventient Center.

Abundance. What a concept.

Hugs,
Me

Not Doing So Well

I’ve been melting down, or nearly so, for the past couple weeks. Everything is going well, but it’s not. I’m not letting myself be affected by stress, but I am. Apparently I am doing a good job of isolating stress from what I’m doing, and a poor job of dumping the stress or destressing so it’s building up.

The past couple days at work I have been nearly useless. The guys have not been doing well at all. There is still a lot of turmoil, getting staff in to cover slots instead of getting back to some kind of normal, and that always distresses the guys. But it’s getting to me, instead of my usual way of letting it flow over me.

The stresses have been: Death of car, dealing with my mother to get me home and then replace car, performance itself (although mitigated by how well I did), all the stuff going on at work (manager’s death, loss of staff, reaction of guys), the extra hours I worked to make up my missed time, information on my disability (which might end in 2 years, the way I read the law — and they don’t say explicitly anywhere what happens at the end of what they are now calling the “3-year extended trial work period”). And then the death of Robin Williams. That especially hit me because of all the potential suicides I’ve stopped, and the knowledge that he had stopped a few himself.

So how do I destress? I have people I can tell the problems to, but it doesn’t go away. I have nobody I can hold. Meditation has never worked for me, although I give it another try every few weeks/months/years.

OK, there is your 5 minutes of angst. Nothing to see here. Move along.

Hugs,
Me

More Music

I’m getting ready for my trip to Pittsburgh, where I just found out I’m going to have a 90-minute concert. Wow. Can’t remember the last time I was given more than 30-45 minutes. Gotta practice more… something which I am not doing…

And now I got invited to perform this September in Dillsboro, NC, at an organization related to the Canary Coalition. And I’m still gearing up for my November performance in Charleston, SC.

It must be 15 or 20 years since I had 3 major concerts in a year. I feel so blessed. People are listening to my music and lifting it up, not putting me down. My most triggering (and most healing) songs are being listened to and seen as positive (which is what I wrote them for).

I’m still having trouble writing new stuff. Even my article writing seems to have ground to a halt but I’m trying to push through that. Hopefully the blessings of performance and a positive reception at those performances will move me forward.

Hugs,
Me

Cats

No, nothing happened with my cats, just had to think of a new title LOL. The weekend was quite uneventful. Some stress waiting for someone to call but it worked out. Have some writer’s block, I have an article due soon for Peppermint & Sage eZine, had plenty of time to get it done and just couldn’t. Had the file open even. Went to bed about my usual, woke up about my usual, and feel like I’ve been working all day before I even get done with morning chores. Guess I’ll go lounge in my chair (broke broked broken) until the mail comes, I should get a couple good things in the mail.

I still have thousands of copies of my CD available for download… All the Love…

One of the authors I used to work with has been complaining on Facebook about my former employer. Apparently she thinks she can sell his book royalty-free after his contract expires. He didn’t like that.   Hugs, Me

Lazy Days

My friend has moved on, hopefully to find housing and employment soon. He is welcome to come back for a few days if needed.

I have a weekend off, which is normal.

I’m not doing much of anything. There is still some unpacking or repacking to do, getting my storage in better shape, etc. I will likely take a stab at some of this.

I have another friend coming for a couple days’ visit from Detroit, due to arrive on the 9th. We are considering taking in a Smokies baseball game on the 11th before she moves along.

It is nice to have control of my life, a comfortable apartment, and almost enough food to get by until I get more (next paycheck on the 3rd).

Hugs,
Me

Hanging on

The weekend had a lot of really good times, and then things fell off. My family did not feel as welcome as I did. And on the way home, some of the old things resurfaced and I’m feeling a bit on loose footing again. I’m sure it’s just my feelings, but it’s never good to ignore those.

Work is going well and I am going to try a day shift this Sunday — my usual Fridays are taken by someone else for a few weeks and I need the work (e.g., the money). I thought about even trying a shift at another House. But my House Manager has confidence in me, which is a good thing.